21... But considering 12

Happy Birthday to me!!

Birthday celebrations have finally all wrapped up, and I am officially legal!

I have celebrated with my closest friends at a beautiful restaurant, with a classy martini at a fancy restaurant with my love, with a margarita on the San Antonio Riverwalk, and with another margarita at our favorite Mexican food restaurant in the entire world with my closest family. All of these events on separate days, of course!

I have had a fabulous time celebrating this big milestone, and I am so thankful for all the loving smiles and wishes I received.

In the back of my head, though, was a distinct longing for earlier times. I felt a pretty healthy dose of nostalgia for so many things from my childhood, and this post is a direct result.

This is a list of things that were AWESOME about our childhood, and that I personally wish had grown up with us. Things that I wish still existed for us in grown-up form.

Sympathize and commiserate with me as I mourn the loss of the good ole' days.

As I turn 21, consider the most awesome things about being 12! 

• Scholastic Book Fairs

Yes, I have always been a reader. I am a lifetime lover of books and literature of all types. 

However, as much as I loved school back then, there was no school day I looked forward to more than the Scholastic Book Fair day... or even the day we were due to receive the catalog! We CANNOT forget
about those catalogs. Those flimsy newspaper-style golden gems were packed with treasure. 

I recently saw a book fair set up in my church's preschool, and was immediately taken back to the excitement of the entire affair. How fantastic it is to order and receive books in your hands every couple of months! There is no greater joy!

I told Oren that I wish we still had Scholastic Book Fairs, and he lovingly replied: "We still do, Mandi. It's called Barnes and Noble..." Needless to say, I did not share his sentiment.

• American Girl Magazine

What a beautiful publication for young girls everywhere! The other day, I sat in my friend Allee's living room and perused the American Girl issue that had come that morning for her 11-yr-old sister. That magazine just makes people happy! Plain and simple, we were reading such QUALITY material.

Questioning my judgement? Think about it. Where else can young girls read about life skills, emotional growth, artistic creativity, and physical and mental health, in a format so colorful and engaging that they just eat it up? Besides, this is also an important venue for young girls to create and submit their own ideas, artwork, stories, and crafts. 

Today, I long for a grown-up girl version of American Girl. I'm sorry, but Cosmo and Seventeen just don't cut it for me. Where is OUR wholesome and creatively addictive monthly publication??

• Massive sleepovers

Those were the days.... or rather, the nights! When 15 of your closest friends got together for a night of caffeine, sugar, Disney movies, laughter, and the occasional fighting and crying spell. 

Remember the HUGE games of sardines, hide-and-go-seek, and neighborhood-wide scavenger hunts in the dark? Remember those wonderful mothers that provided a smorgasbord of delicious snacks to fuel late-night cravings during intense games of truth-or-dare? 

[Side note: if you'd like to know about the most commonly-asked-for dare that I completed time and time again... that's a story for another time!] 

The best thing about these events was their very frequent occurrence. Each of your friends of COURSE has a birthday, and you could assume there would be yet another sleepover with yet again the same group! This meant that being 12, you basically experienced one very long sleepover that lasted through the entire school year. SCORE.

• Trips to theme parks

When you're not spending your weekend at somebody's sleepover, you can bet you'll be attending a party at a local theme park! 

A myriad of reasons abound for hitting up the local Six Flags or water park: church trip, band trip, choir trip, GT trip, grade-wide field trip.... the list goes on and on. As us kids grew old enough (read: tall enough) to participate in such revelry, teachers and mentors alike dumped us all off for a day of low-maintenance fun. 

The best part for us: rollercoasters were still new, exciting novelties. We were still entranced by the dare to lift our hands off of the restraint bar. We hadn't yet discovered that theme parks were usually hot (in Texas), dirty, crowded, and dreadfully expensive. 

Theme parks were our heaven!

• Kids' Menu

Does this really require explanation? Most things (including the kids' menu) state that annoying maxim "age 12 and under." If you're still 12, you can still order small, cheap dinners. And, better yet, you can still color with crayons on the puzzles side of the kids' menu.

You can't tell me you didn't still ask for a kids' menu (even after you were too old) just so you could color. Yeah, I know. I did it too. Wasn't it great when we weren't yet impostors? 

Where is the entertaining puzzle sheet for 21 year old girls? And where are the accompanying purple crayons??

• Imagination

Most of all, I mourn the loss of my imagination. 

At age 12, we still occasionally played with stuffed animals and our old dolls. We still imagined epic battles with our figurines and we still remembered our sensational adventures of the past. Our old toys were just becoming "old," but hadn't yet lost their dire importance. We still clung fiercely to our childhood. We hadn't yet decided that we had "grown up."

I love observing my choir kids playing freely before rehearsal, because I love how readily they create ideas out of nowhere. I love watching them assign roles to each other-- they can create a new world in under three minutes. 

Don't you wish you were still there? Still able to occupy yourself for hours with only a friend and a couple stuffed animals for entertainment? I know I do. Those were the days.

So, I am now a legal adult. I am now able to order alcohol, vote, buy a lottery ticket, etc. etc. etc. Yet, I hold tightly to my memories of my childhood, and the fantastic life we all led back then. 

Take a moment with me and remember just a couple things that bring you joy from your time as a child. Take a moment with me, and smile!

“Everything is ceremony in the wild garden of childhood.” ― Pablo Neruda

Fear and Love

Right now, on this Friday night, I am doing what any other college girl with no plans and an absent roommate would be doing.

I am singing my heart out to the Frozen soundtrack, of course!!!

As I enjoy the vast riches of the Deluxe Edition of the soundtrack on Spotify, I think back and ponder the finer points of this film.

Above all, I feel a complete overwhelming awe for how GREAT this movie is. In seemingly every way. My question for tonight:

What REALLY makes Frozen so fantastic?

In my pondering, I'll discuss a few points that I find personally moving.

1. The Music

Can we just say a big "duh" here? Yes, yes, I know. The music is so good that the songs are stuck in all of our heads from dawn till dusk. It's so good that beginning today, movie theaters nationwide are re-releasing the film in sing-along form. 

We all know that any time somebody says the words "Let it go," we are melodically transplanted into Arendelle. We get it.

But do we really? 

Disney once again made a masterpiece with Frozen's score and songs. Why is this music SO transporting to us? 

The score is full of sounds recorded straight from traditional Nordic instruments. The introductory choral celebration is recorded by Cantus, an all-female Norwegian ensemble, and the piece itself is inspired by traditional Scandinavian folk music. A very traditional vocal technique from Sweden called "Kulning" is featured in many of the score numbers. In case you're at all curious, check this out here . 

In short, these songs are AUTHENTIC. To a degree that this music strikes us American listeners as exotic, foreign, and very, very intriguing! 

         2. The Star

Let's not forget to mention the star. Idina Menzel has long been my favorite musical theatre actress since debuting the role of Maureen in Rent. I could write a book on how much I love her voice. 

I didn't know much about the movie Frozen when I first went to the theater. I hadn't researched who was in the cast, or even what the story was going to be. But when I heard those first notes out of Elsa's mouth, I nearly cried. 

Disney picked IDINA!!! Praise the Lord. 

This is all I can say. Idina makes the movie. Her vocal ability shines clearly from the soundtrack like a beacon of hope for all future Disney endeavors. Kristen Bell... Mandy Moore... ok. But in Idina Disney found a true and experienced vocalist. 

The voice truly makes all the difference. 

           3. The Beauty

Disney outdid themselves with this one.

Scandinavian fjords are some of the most beautiful locations on this planet, incorporating beautiful waters, mountains, and skies. Personally on my bucket list is a tour of some of these beautiful places. Even seeing the location in animated form nearly gave me chills.

In case you're curious again about the authenticity of Disney's portrayal, check this out.

Yes, it really IS that beautiful over there. Maybe I'll get to make a trip up to Norway during my study abroad next fall? :)

Also notable is the beauty of the characters themselves! Elsa and Anna are both of course very beautifully animated, with incredibly detailed eyes, faces, hair, and costumes.

Pause on the hair aspect for a moment. Go to youtube and feast your eyes on the vast infinity that is "Frozen hair tutorials." I include myself in this obsession! Some of my inspired designs below.

Disney gave us animated beauty that is so real, we long to see it in the real world.

          4. The Moral

In case nobody noticed, being so far baffled visually and aurally by the gorgeous work of art that is Frozen, the film actually has a very profound moral.

And no, I am NOT talking about Elsa's (and Disney's) conviction that "You cannot marry a man you just met." Cue an eye roll toward all the victorious memes out there.

The profound lesson that I paid close attention to, especially the second time around, was the contrast between Fear and Love. Yes, that is the final realization that saves the day.

However, I find way more interesting the fact that Anna and Elsa throughout the film embody these two traits. They speak them into reality. They each live their conviction toward one or the other, and yet... neither of them quite understands consciously what force is ruling their everyday existence.

This struck home for me, as I contemplated what might be the driving force behind my life (that I might not even notice). I won't go into it here, but this was a great springboard for some super introspective journaling.

What inspires YOU to act? To take risks? What drives you to run away, and what drives you to run toward your goals?

Elsa and Anna helped me realize the importance of having a loving understanding of your whole self-- including all your limitations, weaknesses, and triumphs. Only then can you begin to truly understand the reasoning behind your biggest decisions... and only then will you have the power to change them for the better.

Peeking Into My Art Journal

Yesterday evening, I realized  an unbelievable fact. I had before me a completely free evening. No plans with friends, no night classes, no rehearsals, no homework, no obligations... How in heaven's name did I come by this treasure on a Thursday of all days?

I am still baffled.

In any case, I journaled about my sheer excitement over having my first ounce of "free time." Why is this a big deal, you ask? I'll tell you. Because people always ask me the typical 'What do you do with your free time' question, and I always laugh and reply ironically that I don't have any.

I can finally answer that question in a positive way!!! That night, I had before me three completely free hours with which to pursue whatever activity my heart desired.

I spent a long twenty minutes just contemplating what I would most like to do. Should I take a long bubble bath? (BAD IDEA with a halfway-working water heater that ended up producing the most disappointingly lukewarm bubble bath I have ever experienced.) Should I spend the time reading my lovely Anne of Green Gables, which I have been so enjoying? Should I blog? Should I play Final Fantasy X on my Playstation 2? The list goes on. You can see why this took me twenty minutes.

I finally decided to spend the evening in creativity, with my Art Journal. If you've never heard of Art Journaling, check out an explanatory article here. Or, just google it. I dare you. :)

One of my favorite art journal pages from the past 

Thursday night, I spent all of that time art journaling. Messing around with pen, doodles, watercolors, and words... basically just expressing the creativity within me in whichever ways it decided to present itself.

Why do I love art journaling? A list.

• It takes a significantly short amount of time to create a beautifully "complete" artwork-- perfect for my busy schedule!
• It's the perfect short-term outlet for daily creative work.
• Inside my art journal, it's perfectly alright to experiment with colors and techniques. There is no such thing as "messing up."
• I love looking back on all my pages and seeing the incredible variety.
• It is an art form that includes one of my other favorite personal disciplines of all time-- journaling!
• In short, Art Journaling is FUN!

A Zentangle, start to finish!

I also love Art Journaling because it gives me an opportunity to create side-by-side with those I love.

Sawyer and I frequently have Art Journal "parties"-- don't even get me started on how inspiring it is to see her creativity explode in her pages. I've always admired her eye for color, shape, and the profound meaning she gives to all her work. Just one example of how Art Journaling can bring people together, in a deep way!

I'm not sure that I could as easily sketch or paint a canvas with a friend... I would be much too focused on making the perfect piece of art.

That's not what this is about.

Art Journaling is one of many ways in which I am learning to be the keeper of my own flame. And fulfilling that purpose, friends, is exactly what I choose to do with my free time.


In case you're interested,

Some of my favorite Art Journaling links:
Absolutely gorgeous zentangle/watercolor inspiration from Alisa Burke
One of my favorite Pinboards featuring Art Journaling techniques-- Colleen Sullivan-Blake
A creative "art journal prompts" list-- BlacksburgBelle.com

Enjoy creating!

An Afternoon In Love

Yesterday afternoon, I went on another hiking excursion. This time, I fell in love.

Oren and I spent the afternoon walking the Greenbelt Corridor trail of Ray Roberts State Park, in the most perfect weather anybody could have imagined.

Words can hardly describe how I felt, walking the miles on this gorgeous forested path, quietly away from all distraction, with only the occasional bicyclist or dog walker for company.

Even in the winter months, the heart of the "dead" season here in North Texas, this place was beautifully green. Pictures hardly do it justice. The bare trees left room for sunlight to reach the forest floor and provide nourishment for bright green grasses to flourish and provide a beautiful emerald carpet throughout the acres of country.

 Looking up, every now and then, we caught a glimpse of bright white Aspen trees, growing tall and strong, swaying gracefully in the breeze.

We sat on perfect tree stumps and imagined forested tea parties that could take place. We climbed on dead logs and walked along the river. We ran for a stretch and enjoyed the sheer beauty we passed by. We took a rest on a little grassy area and saw hawks flying silently and calmly overhead.

I hugged the largest trees I could find and adored feeling their strength.

I imagined bringing my journal and Bible out there for a quiet afternoon of meditation, and relished the thought of taking a picnic out to one of the perfect little clearings just off the path.

I imagined placing a grand piano in one of those clearings, and playing beautiful music in the sheer center of the gorgeous forest.

As I said, over and over, I could spend my life out there. I could go there daily and never get bored. I feel that my soul was renewed, one step at a time, one tree after another.

I have no doubt that I need the natural world, especially after being so fulfilled by an afternoon spent in rapturous beauty.

As Richard Louv puts it so well,  "a reconnection to the natural world is fundamental to human health, well-being, spirit, and survival.” 

I can't wait to go back! 

I thank you God for this most amazing day, 

for the leaping greenly spirits of trees, 

and for the blue dream of sky 

and for everything which is natural, 

which is infinite, which is yes.

- e.e. cummings

New Year's Update

Beware: this post is decidedly late. But I thought I would love to update everyone on my gorgeous New Year's events! So enjoy :)

 Oren bought Trans Siberian Orchestra tickets for my big Christmas gift this year. The concert was fantastic! Although, I am pretty sure Oren bought himself his own best Christmas present-- he loved the concert a million times more than even I did!

Isn't this a fabulous family photo? :)

One night of the New Year, my parents took the family down to Fair Park in Dallas to see the Chinese Lantern Festival! I loved seeing everything all lit up. It was gorgeous. Quite cold, but very appropriate for seeing such beautiful outdoor lights. Sometimes, around the holidays, I think it just might be alright for the weather to be frigid. :)

Oren and I thought these pandas were so adorable! 

 Later, my best friend Sawyer and I went out hiking on a nature preserve in Sherman.

Such a delightful idea turned into a real beast of an adventure when we got seriously lost on the unmarked trails and oil service gravel roads of this backcountry. The sheriff may or may not have been called for help... and may or may not have driven out in the reserve to rescue us after dark. Moral of the story-- parks should mark their trails, gosh dangit!

Anyway, we fun spending time together, and I witnessed a moment of submission as we recognized the power of prayer in the middle of our panic.

Finally, Oren and I took a trip to see the Dallas Symphony Orchestra perform Dvorak's Symphony for the New World (and Brahms' Piano Concerto No. 2 in Bb).

I absolutely LOVE going to see the symphony, and I try to go pretty often due to our close proximity and the fact that we get $15 student tickets! This is a little known Dallas fact that I try to reveal to anyone who will listen. Check it out here.

My favorite moment of this performance of the New World  Symphony came in the Largo movement, which is usually everybody's favorite. It's not usually mine, because to my mind once you've heard the 'Going Home' theme once, you've heard it a million times. I usually prefer the first or last movements over the Largo.

However, this time, the DSO under Jaap van Zweden surprised me. They performed the last statement of the lyrical theme with deliciously placed rests that extended the cadence-- an interpretation I have never heard before. It was the kind of silence that was surprising, shocking, and yet simply delightful. The entire audience held their breath, waiting for the fall of the conductor's baton marking the highly anticipated final notes. The emotion was tangible in the concert hall.

I can't remember the last time I was surprised by an orchestra, and certainly not in such a profound way. At the end of the night, that was the phrase that I wrote on a slip of magenta paper and tucked into my gratitude jar. (More on that another time).

 I hope that all of you-- anyone stopping by-- is celebrating the start of this new year with moments as joyful and meaningful as mine have been. Happy New Year!

“Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.”  — Ralph Waldo Emerson

10 Books Mandi's Reading in 2014

In the midst of working on many New Year's resolutions, plans, and goals, I decided to set out a to-read list for myself for the new year!

Anticipating my upcoming semester abroad, I set myself a reasonable goal of reading ten books this year. Among these are books new and old, classic and contemporary, inspiring and fun.

If you're interested, check these out with me!

 

The Nature Principle-- Richard Louv

I read the beginning chapters of this book in my Philosophy of Self class last spring. I was completely intrigued by the idea that being out in nature could be something my heart longs for. I can't wait to learn more!

Anne of Green Gables-- L. M. Montgomery

A classic story that I have sadly never read. I think it's about time I got into it! (Perhaps I'll read Little Women next year...)

I Am Malala—Malala Yousafzai

The autobiography of the year. Promises to be a great read, and probably very inspiring!

Mere Christianity—C. S. Lewis

I have recently been very interested in getting into some C. S. Lewis theology, and after much research this is where I have decided to start. As the foremost writer on Christian doctrine (and a man who wrote one amazing fantasy series), I think Lewis will provide a great read.

Love Does—Bob Goff

This appears to be a very heart-warming and inspiring story of one man who led one very extraordinary life. I can’t wait to read about all of his stunning adventures, and learn all about his positive outlook!

The Cuckoo’s Calling—JKR

I couldn’t call myself a loyal fan if I didn’t at least give this a try! I didn’t care for ‘A Casual Vacancy’ at all, but I am excited to see what this new work is like.

Fearless Girls, Wise Women, and Beloved Sisters: Heroines in Folktales from Around the World—Kathleen Ragan

I seriously adore folk and fairy tales, especially those that allow me to explore other cultures and perspectives. I ran across this book last summer in a Chicago bookstore and am still thinking about reading it to this day! I think that’s a good sign. I can’t wait to get into this collection of tales all about women.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Half-Blood Prince, and Deathly Hallows—JKR

I began re-reading the series this past summer and didn’t finish. Hopefully I get these re-read soon! 

What books are you excited to read in 2014? Let me know below!

Advent Wreath Mindfulness

This year I began a new Christmas tradition that I hoped would help me slow down and live into each moment of this holiday season. This was JUST the thing! Raised a Methodist, I have seen season after season of Advent wreath lightings in church services around Christmas time. I never knew that the tradition could be used as a personal ritual in preparation for Christ's birth! 

Most of my friends had never heard of an Advent wreath before I undertook this four-week spiritual journey. If you are like them, you're in luck! I will gladly explain it to you. 

An advent wreath is a circle of candles in a wreath of evergreen, coming from German tradition. Each candle has a specific symbolism, and typical Methodist wreaths include three purple candles, one pink candle, and one central white "Christ" candle. As celebrated in the churches I have visited, one candle is lit for each of the four weeks leading up to Christmas, to symbolize our preparation for Christ's coming. The Christ candle is lit on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. If you'd like to learn more about Advent as celebrated in the Methodist church, click here! 

I was first inspired by the adult leader of the meditation bible study I attend at the Denton Wesley Foundation to begin a mindfulness practice for the upcoming Christmas season. I wanted to spend the season being PRESENT, living each moment to the fullest and not waking up at the end feeling as though I missed the point of everything. We discussed various ritual practices that can help us live the holidays spiritually, and doing a daily advent wreath called to me. 

I rushed to the Hobby Lobby (I am their most loyal customer) and fought the busy crowds in the floral aisles to find a brass Advent wreath base (no idea they sold these!!), greenery, little pinecone accents, and of course candles (which they also sold in an Advent set. Who knew??). After much bending and fluffing, I came up with a pretty acceptable-looking wreath.                                                                                                           Side note: I used to think that wreath and garland making would be a nice hobby for me to add to my crafter's portfolio... now I am just not so sure. First, because I have realized that each little element that goes on a wreath costs 3-4 dollars apiece! And second, I sadly don't think I have an eye for plant decorating, fake or otherwise. Sigh. Oh well! My advent wreath is pretty enough and functional enough to serve its purpose beautifully. 

Anyway, after my little wreath was made, I composed a four week study plan in my journal with a theme for each week that I chose. My four candles represented Hope, Purity, Joy, and Expectation! I used plenty of the resources here to find applicable scriptures to read, prayers to pray, and little meditations to study.

I also divided my usual Christmas traditions across the four weeks, according to theme. For the Hope week I planned to write and send my usual Christmas cards and put up Christmas lights inside and out-- two activities that really send and speak hope in my eyes. For Purity, I decided to clean out closets and donate items, as well as evaluating the highlights of my life for the past year and my old New Year's resolutions-- out with the old! For Joy, I planned to sing carols with loved ones, watch Christmas movies, and bake goodies. For Expectation, I re-imagined the nativity scene and planned to create an art journal page celebrating the return of the sun (after Winter Solstice). This way, I did all of my usual traditional activities mindfully and spiritually.

And each night, I sat in the dark with my journal, Bible, and my little Advent wreath, to light a candle or two and meditate on the coming of the light.

Nearing the end of this holiday season, many friends have commented on "how fast it's gone by" for them, but I happily don't feel that way this year! The nightly study and mindful actions kept me grounded and slowed down the days for me. I consider it a rousing success! I can't wait to see what new ways I will find to celebrate Christmas next year.

I hope that all of you have had a beautiful Christmas season, and that you enter the new year with mindfulness and joy.




A few of my favorite pages exploring being PRESENT and other mindfulness practices are below! Enjoy!
A Day of Mindfulness 
A Basic Guide to Self-Care
One Winter Solstice Ritual